Wired for Love Couple Workshop
Creating a Successful, Personalized Approach to Your Relationship
August 17 - 19, 2018
Friday - Sunday, 2 nights10 CE Credits Available
Plus 2 nights all-inclusive accommodations priced separatelyRegister Now
“People are complex,” says Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, clinician, teacher, and developer of the Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy® (PACT). “We don’t come with manuals that explain and automate the process of getting along.”
Even if we did, we aren’t robots: what works for one person or relationship won’t necessarily work for another. Nor does it work to fly blind, as many couples do, and expect relationships to fall simply into place.
PACT changes everything. Developed based on cutting-edge research in neuroscience, attachment theory, and nervous-system arousal, this PACT-inspired workshop offers you an understanding of the basic principles that make a relationship successful.
During this fun and interesting weekend of teaching, interactive exercises, and experimenting, you will learn how to:
- Explain how to fix, repair, or correct injuries or errors in a timely manner.
- Create shared principles of governance to guide behavior.
- Define and describe attachment orientations.
- Define secure functioning in love relationships.
- Identify and correct situations whereby either mismanage thirds.
Stan and Tracey will explain the fundamental biological realities of human bonding, and reveal the psychobiological particulars of each one of us.
As a result, you will come to understand how you and your partner really work. The tools you take home are invaluable, and ready to be used immediately in making your relationship thrive.
Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT
Clinician, researcher, and couples therapist
Stan Tatkin is a clinician, researcher, teacher, and developer of A Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy® (PACT), which draws on cutting-edge research in neuroscience, attachment theory, and biology.
He is the author of three well-received books about relationship—Wired for Dating, Wired for Love, and Your Brain on Love—and is coauthor of Love and War in Intimate Relationships.
Dr. Tatkin maintains a clinical practice in Calabasas, California, where he uses PACT with couples and individuals. He and his wife, Tracey Boldemann-Tatkin, developed the PACT Institute to train other psychotherapists to use PACT in their clinical practice.
Dr. Tatkin also teaches and supervises family medicine residents at Kaiser Permanente and is an assistant clinical professor at the UCLA David Geffen School of Medicine. He is on the board of directors of Lifespan Learning Institute and serves as a core member on Relationships First, a nonprofit organization founded by Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt.Tracey Boldemann-Tatkin, PhD
Tracey Boldemann-Tatkin has served as the director of a variety of philanthropic family foundations for the last 29 years, working with the dynamics and mechanics of families through daily interactions with the family members whose foundations she manages.
Tracey is cofounder of the PACT Institute with her husband Dr. Stan Tatkin, the developer of PACT (a Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy). Together they travel nationally and internationally, educating mental-health professionals in PACT.
Tracey studied business administration at UCLA and holds a master of arts in philanthropic studies, as well as a master’s degree in public administration, and is currently a doctoral candidate at the Walden School of Public Policy.View Bio Page
Learn specific ways to create a successful relationship together
Read body language and recognize triggered states
Understand how to manage conflict and integrate mind and body to build a<br /> secure-functioning relationship
Begin to construct a personalized owner's manual for your relationship.
Things to Know/Schedule
Friday, August 17
7:30 PM-7:45 PM: Welcome & Introduction Overview of what couples can expect over the weekend from this retreat. Include the items on page 2 of the handbook. Let them know you might ask people to participate in a fishbowl etc… Establish the confidentiality in the room.
7:45 PM-8:00 PM: Principal 1: Couple bubble? Why be a couple?
8:00 PM-8:15 PM: Secure functioning Introduce and explain the concept of secure functioning
8:15 PM-9:15 PM: Each person briefly indicate their name, where they are from, why they came, and what one thing they hope to gain from the weekend.
9:15 PM-9:30 PM: Wrap Up/ Q&A Bedtime exercise/homework: Putting each other to bed. (set up gazing importance briefly), which also sets up landing and launchings – or separations and reunions.
Saturday, August 18
6:30 AM-7:45 AM: Yoga and Meditation
7:00 AM-8:30 AM: Breakfast
9:00 AM-9:20 AM: Exercise: King and Queen
9:20 AM-9:35 AM: Debrief and Q & A
9:35 AM-9:50 AM: Principal 2: Loving Warring Brain
9:50 AM-10:10 AM: Exercise: Couples face to face and are led through “poses” by Stan (*see below)
10:10 AM-10:25 AM: Debrief and Q & A
10:25 AM-10:55 AM: Principal 3: Know Your Partner – Introduce attachment styles (wave, island, anchor), where they come from and why they matter.
10:55 AM-11:10 AM: Q & A
11:10 AM-11:30 AM: Demonstration: Role play with a couple where one is an island and the other is a wave. The result should be giving them some “tools.”
11:30 AM-11:45 AM: Principal 4: How to Please & Soothe Your Partner
11:45 AM-12:00 PM: Demo how to soothe and please
12:00-12:15 PM: Q & A
*look away from your partner, still face, folded arms, finger pointing, dismissive hand movement, head to the side, back to partner, roll eyes, breathe on partner, chin raised, testosterone arms, lips tight, teeth bared.
12:15 PM – 3:00 PM Lunch/Break
3:00 PM-3:15 PM: Talk about the 3 or 4 things
3:15 PM-3:35 PM: demo for 3 to 4 things
3:35 PM-3:45 PM: Q & A
3:45 PM-3:55 PM: Principal 5: Landings and Launchings finish about reunions and lead into attraction without fear, threat or shame
3:55 PM-4:15 PM: Demonstrations: Welcome home and beckoning exercises how to get your partner to come home
4:15 PM-4:25 PM: Q & A
4:25 PM-4:35 PM: Principal 6: Go To People
4:35 PM-5:00 PM: Principal 7: Thirds (Thirds needs time)
5:30 PM-5:15 PM: Fish bowl with a couple struggling with this principal (assistant participation as third if necessary)
5:15 PM-5:30 PM: Q & A
5:30 PM-5:50 PM: Principal 9: Love up Close – partners face-to-face while Stan explains the concept and leads them with playdoh face – first the first name for love part here as well
5:50 PM-6:00 PM: Debrief and Q & A/Wrap up include housekeeping, be on time in the morning
Sunday, August 19
6:30 AM-7:45 AM: Yoga and Meditation
7:00 AM-8:30 AM: Breakfast
8:30 AM-8:45 AM: Check in
8:45 AM-9:00 AM: Principal 8: Fighting Well
9:00 AM-9:25 AM: Demo: Fish bowl with couple – couple struggling with fighting or just wanting your guidance for 5- minute resolution/compromise
9:25 AM-9:40 AM: Q & A
9:40 AM-9:55 AM: Principal 10: How Partnership Can Heal You
9:55 AM-10:15 AM: Demo
10:15 AM-10:25 AM: Q & A
10:25 AM-10:35 AM: Conclusion with explanation of Naikan and social contract
10:35 AM-11:00 AM: Exercise: Futurize your Partnership – gazing with Stan in trance
11:00 AM-11:30 AM: Debrief exercise and Q & A/Wrap up and closing the weekend – so important to wrap it up and tie it together with a BEAUTIFUL bow
CE Hours Available
This course has been approved for 10 CE hours for qualified participants. To learn how and where to apply, click HERE.
New Payment and Cancellation Policy
A deposit of 50% of your total stay package (tuition plus accommodations and applicable taxes) is due at time of reservation and can be made with Visa, MasterCard, American Express, or Discover.
The remaining 50% of your total stay package (tuition plus accommodations and applicable taxes) is due upon arrival and can be made with Visa, MasterCard, American Express, or Discover.
Cancellations and Refunds
The following policies apply to all standard programs. Some programs may have special cancellation policies; see individual workshop descriptions.
If You Cancel
- If you cancel 30 or more days prior to your arrival date, your 50% deposit will be refunded.
- If you cancel between 21 days and 29 days prior to your arrival date, your 50% deposit will be held on account for one year from the date of issue for a future visit.
- No credit or refund is available if you cancel fewer than 21 days prior to your arrival day, if you do not show up, or if you leave a program or event early.
- No credit or refund will be available if you attend a program and are dissatisfied with its presentation or content.
If 1440 Multiversity Cancels
On rare occasions, due to unforeseen circumstances, 1440 Multiversity may need to cancel a program. We will notify registrants of cancellation a minimum of 7 days in advance of the program start date and will offer a full refund for housing and tuition or the option to rebook in an available course or our R&R program offered at the same time period of the original reservation. If you are purchasing airfare to visit 1440, we recommend investigating travel insurance with appropriate coverage for ultimate flexibility, since 1440 will not reimburse for travel expenses.
Participants of approved continuing education courses may register complaints with the approval entity with an option to appeal to their licensing Board if displeased with the results of the process.
For questions or concerns, please email [email protected]
Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner’s Brain Can Help You Defuse Conflicts and Spark Intimacy, Stan Taktin
About 1440 Multiversity
Beautifully nestled in the California redwoods near Santa Cruz, our 75-acre campus is within easy reach of San Francisco and Silicon Valley.
1440 Multiversity is a place to spend time engaging some of life's most meaningful personal questions and to enjoy, restore, and reenergize yourself as you do it.
You'll find new energy through immersion learning—setting aside daily urgencies and dedicating uninterrupted time to focus on important, but often elusive, priorities. Our unique collaboration with world-class faculty coupled with an original, inspirational curriculum and magnificent grounds make this a place like no other. Add in fresh, redwood-scented air, delicious and healthy food, deep reflection, fun exercise, and good sleep and you've pretty much captured what you'll experience here.
At 1440 Multiversity, you’ll find a wide range of accommodations to meet your preferences and budget. All of our rooms have been thoughtfully designed to provide comfort, promote reflection, and foster connection with others.
Accommodation rates include more than just the bed you sleep in.
Per-person per-night rates include:
- nourishing locally sourced, seasonal meals
- daily meditation and yoga classes
- non-ticketed evening events
- use of all facilities, including the Fitness Center, steam rooms, and infinity-edge hot tub.
Guests also enjoy access to woodland trails, cafés, and shops.